Random older things my girlfriend and I have argued about

This is Random Older Thing number 25 of 62. You are Random Reader 223.

We've also argued about:

Listen to this. This shows why Margret will always have me whipped. Yesterday morning I'm lying in bed struggling to orientate my newly-awoken self in the standard manner - 'What day is it?', 'Who am I?', 'Where did Andrea Corr go?', etc., etc. Margret is lying next to me and has also just woken up. As she melts into focus I see she is staring at my face with a shifting blend of confusion and alarm. She speaks. Guess what she says? No, go on. You have the facts and I know many of you fancy yourselves forensic psychologists of some subtly and depth - so let's see if you can guess what she says. Write it down, so you can't cheat. Done? OK, Margret says

'Why have your eyebrows gone white?'

Even now I hear you backlash 'Pchh - well, that's not fair. How could we know your eyebrows had gone white? There was no clue to that.' Really, have you read this far and learned so little, my friends? Margret said my eyebrows had gone white, my eyebrows, of course, had not really gone white. How the hell could they? But now, right at the start of the day, I'm on my back foot. In mere seconds I've gone from asleep to the panicky disarray of a man who's awoke to discover his eyebrows have spontaneously blanched while he slept. It doesn't matter that when I check my eyebrows in the bathroom mirror (and return throughout the day to keep rechecking them) they are the same as they've always been. At 7.15am already the mental battle is won. The day is Margret's.

Oh, come on. Of course they are. Look - here's a picture I took of them just a few seconds ago. OK?